A Very, Merry Christmas, Indeed
by The Integral of Awesome
Summary: For a sixteen year-old stuck so deep in his closet he knew when it was snowing in Narnia, Gabe was doing pretty damn well. That was, until his family got together for Christmas. Then everything went to hell.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Jo was the first person to find out about Gabe, under the bleachers, tongue shoved down Bobby Baker's throat. He wasn't even sure if Bobby knew, really, because Bobby wasn't gay, just wanted to shove his tongue down someone's throat, and Gabe was a warm mouth. And it didn't hurt that Gabe was _really fucking easy_. Like, hand-job-after-15-minutes-of-conversation easy. Blow job if he was really hot.

Of course, Jo's vision wasn't clouded by teenage-boy hormones, and she'd always been quicker on the uptake than most of their classmates. It was why they got along so well. Neither of them were all that book-smart, but, _damn_, were they street-smart. That was how it was when they were 11 and building a fake volcano, how it was when they were 13 and pulling pranks on every kid in their grade _and_ the one above them, and how it sure as hell was when they were 16 and Jo was _looking_ at him like that. A little betrayed, a little amused, and_ a lot_ like he'd be getting an ear-full of this later.

Eventually Bobby spotted her, too (although it took _forever_, and, really, what had Gabe ever seen if Bobby Baker? Except for the muscles, and, well, _swim team_. So, yeah.), and then it was all, "Shit, shit, shit! I have to go. Shit. Don't tell anyone. Not that this was- I mean, I'm not- Just, keep your mouth shut. And keep _her_-" and there was an emphatic pointing at Jo here that made Bobby's muscles _stretch_ and Gabe stared shamelessly "-mouth shut." And then Bobby was storming off, wiping at his mouth and adjusting his close, and Gabe didn't even get the chance to _enjoy_ Bobby walking away because suddenly Jo was there, raised eyebrow looming over (well, under, technically, since Gabe had hit that growth spurt and gotten as tall as PJ) him.

"Bobby Baker?" She sounded unimpressed. "_Seriously_, I'm judging you for this."

So Gabe knew they'd be alright.

There was, of course, the "why didn't you tell me"s and the "you know we'll always be friend, dick-wad"s, but, truth be told, Gabe had always suspected that Jo had always suspected. Their relationship wasn't talking-based. They just got each other, two peas and all that. She'd been Gabe's first crush, and he'd been hers. That was, of course, before Gabe discovered the _wonders_ of cock, but that was beside the point. Jo still meant a hell of a lot more to him than _Bobby Baker_.

Bobby Baker, who Gabe didn't see after that day. He heard a rumor that he'd switched schools. Jo teased him about scaring boys off with a single kiss, to which Gabe countered that there'd been a hell of a lot more than "a single kiss" and Jo stuck her fingers in her ears and screeched, "TMI, Gabe. Seriously, _dude_. T. M. I."

Jo once asked him, when they were hanging out at his house, killing something undead with blasters that looked suspiciously like lollypops on Jo's latest catch from whatever shady source sold her games, if he was ever going to tell his family. Gabe had shot another undead whatchamacallit and pointedly avoided the question. Jo didn't ask again, but she did beat him mercilessly in the game (Gabe hadn't even known they were playing _against_ each other and presumed that Jo had withheld that knowledge on purpose).

It wasn't that Gabe thought his family would _hate him_ or something, kick him out like all those horror stories or send him off to some camp to "cure" him. His family was pretty kick-ass, although he would _never_ tell them to their faces, but Gabe had always been the _different_ one. He was the brown-haired one; he was the trouble-making one. He just didn't, on top of everything, want to be _the gay one_, so Gabe was avoiding the issue.

If he never told them, it could never be weird. They would never have that awkward first "Is this your _boyfriend_?" moment or that infinitely more awkward "No, this is just a boy friend" moment. They would never have that awkward "You can always adopt" moment when Gabe was _way too young_ to be thinking about future life partners and possible children. They would never have that awkward "You're - gay?" moment where their whole world had to readjust and Gabe felt like a failure of a son for being even _more_ trouble.

So, what they didn't know couldn't hurt them.

Of course, shit was bound to go down eventually. Merry fucking Christmas


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Christmas time is here. " Jo was actually singing at him. Not well, but he could mostly make out the melody. "Happiness and cheer."

Yeah, right. Happiness and cheer.

It wasn't that Gabe had anything against Christmas. After all, no school? Presents? Christmas was _the best_, but it also brought all the Duncans back under the same roof, which didn't happen often since Teddy and even PJ had gone off to school (Gabe had never heard of PJ's but it couldn't be very good considering they had accepted _PJ_), and if there was one thing the Duncans were good at, it was making everything go to hell, and fast.

Jo was still singing, so Gabe slugged her in the shoulder (very _lightly_, though it wasn't like Jo needed the delicacy. She had a wicked right hook; Gabe should know) to make her shut up.

Jo glared half-heartedly at him but didn't comment on his fowl mood because she knew _why_ he was in it (because she could secretly read minds, was Gabe's personal theory). He always got this way when his entire family would be back under one roof. Especially Teddy. Teddy was _observant_. Teddy had noticed a hickey on his neck the last time she was in town and hadn't dropped the subject until she left again. He'd taken all his significant powers of persuasion to keep her from filling the rest of their family in on his predicament (she'd been fairly convinced that Jo had given it to him, and Gabe had to hold himself back from gagging at the suggestion). And that had just been one hickey.

How was Gabe supposed to survive _another_ break with them all huddled together, keen eyes watching his every move?

"You could always tell them," Jo said because, as previously expressed, she could _read his mind_.

Gabe didn't say anything, rubbing a hand across his forehead.

Jo sighed. "I know this isn't your favorite choice of subject material, here, but it's kind of important, and you are my best friend." She looked small, which never happened, even if she was only 5'2''. "I worry about you."

So, Gabe hugged her. It was awkward because they weren't super touchy-feely and didn't really do the whole hug thing, but it was also nice. Jo squeezed his shoulders a little before pulling away and whispered, "They won't mind, and even if they would, you'd always have me."

Gabe wanted to say that he was scared, that he didn't even know what he was scared of, that this was his _family_ and that he just couldn't take the chance, but he didn't say any of it. Instead, he bumped Jo's shoulder and suggested ice cream, even though it was 30 degrees outside. She said it sounded like a great idea, and Gabe had the feeling that she knew everything he couldn't say


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

PJ was the first one back in town, and he immediately insisted on taking Gabe out for some "brotherly bonding". They started out bowling but ended up meandering through the park while PJ drank beer and Gabe weaseled three just-one-more's out of him. Gabe liked nights like that with his brother, all laid-back smiles and half-finished thoughts.

PJ wasn't the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree (and, seeing as their father hadn't replaced the lights for the last two decades, that was saying something), but that just made it easier to dodge the "So, are their any new females in my dearest brother's life?"s (PJ was tipsy enough to forget that he'd decommissioned "dearest brother" after Toby was born because he didn't want to play favorites).

It was nice and easy, and PJ inevitably started waxing poetic about some new girl halfway through the night, and Gabe could tune him out for the most part and just enjoy the harsh winter air. The wind was keeping his cheeks a bright shade of red, but it was a mild enough night for December that it wasn't unbearable to be out. There was a thin layer of snow crunching under their feet as they trudged along, and Gabe was so hypnotized by the night and alcohol in his veins that he almost didn't notice when PJ broke off suddenly from describing the most recent girl's "locks of tantalizing gold" to say, "You know, we really never talk about your love life."

Gabe shrugged and implemented his usual avoidance techniques. "Not much to talk about. You were saying something about her eyes?"

But apparently PJ had had less to drink than Gabe had thought because he wasn't so easily distracted. "No, seriously. You're my little bro'. There must be someone special in your life. What about Jo? I know she had a crush on you back when you were younger."

Gabe could barely hold back his snort. "Jo and me are so not like that, dude."

PJ was frowning, and Gabe almost regretted not just playing along with the whole "Jo's my soulmate" thing his whole family seemed so hell-bent on. "Well, then, some girl at school. There must at least be someone you think is cute."

"Well-" Gabe figured the only way he was getting out of this was with the truth, and since he couldn't tell the whole truth without getting into a whole slew of things that he wasn't going near with a 49 and a half foot pole, he settled for half the truth. "There is this one girl…"

A grin the size of Mount Rushmore broke out on PJ's face. "There, you see! That's my boy." He paused for a second, but when Gabe didn't immediately elaborate, he jostled his shoulder. "Come on, come on. Details, man."

Gabe shrugged, scrubbing a hand through his hair. "Her name's Max- like Maxine," he added quickly, hoping PJ just played it off as nerves. "She's got this gorgeous blonde hair, and these blue eyes, and-" this light shade of stubble that hung around the sharp line of his jaw that Gabe wanted to run his tongue over.

"Where'd you meet her?"

"She's on the track team with Jo," Gabe said, because the boys and girls track teams practiced and competed at the same time and PJ would never know the difference. It was half the reason Gabe went to Jo's insanely long track meets, which Jo knew and mocked him mercilessly for. But Max was a _god among men_, so it didn't even matter.

PJ was still grinning like a fool. "You should ask her out, man!"

Gabe avoided PJ's face, eyes light up like it was already Christmas morning and Gabe had just given him the biggest present under the tree. "She's not interested."

PJ sucked in a breath, and Gabe could hear the soft thud of his hand hitting his chest. "That is simply not possible! You have Duncan blood in you, Gabe. She'd be an idiot not to like you."

Gabe held back the "like you" that was poised on his tongue because PJ was actually trying really hard to be a good brother, and a few years of maturity had made it possible for Gabe to be nice _sometimes_, so all he said was, "Thanks, man," and then he shoved PJ into the snow


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

It was oh-my-God-_why_ o'clock the next morning, and Jo had dragged him out of bed to go to the mall with her. Gabe had tried to turn her down (specifically by throwing his alarm clock at her head), but she was a hard woman to deny, so Gabe was nursing an obscenely complicated coffee drink that Jo, of course, had ordered because Gabe had "no sense of elegancy," whatever the hell that meant. When Gabe ordered his own coffee, he got it black with enough sugar to power a room full of kindergartners for a month, but Jo had gone through a weird coffee phase when they were freshmen and wouldn't stand for anything so "unimaginative."

He was currently waiting outside some store that was persnickety enough to glare at Gabe's coffee with such intensity that he had half a mind to "accidentally" spill his drink all over their nice Christmas display. Recognizing Gabe's barely-concealed authority issues, Jo had immediately ordered him out of the store. Gabe wanted to stay for principle's sake, but Jo was a _very_ hard woman to deny.

Thus, Gabe was huddled outside the store, looking entirely too much like one of the three stoners (Huey, Dewey, and Louie were _honestly_ their names) that went to his school and glaring intently at the ground like he didn't have the balls to do to Jo, when a pair of sneakers paused in front of him and a vaguely familiar voice said, "Excuse me?"

Gabe looked up sharply only to fall into the biggest blue eyes-

Max smiled sunnily at him, and Gabe wanted to punch himself in the face for what a girl he was being. "I thought I recognized you. You're Gabe, right? Jo's friend."

Gabe wasn't sure how happy he was that his qualifier was "Jo's friend," but any doubts there were lost in the obscene haze of "He knows my name!". It was highly pathetic. "Yep. That is me. That is who I am. I am Gabe." _Smooth, Duncan_.

Max continued smiling, though, so Gabe couldn't have freaked him out too much. "I'm Max," he said, extending his hand.

_I know_, Gabe thought, except then Max's eyes got a little weird and Gabe realized that he hadn't just _thought_ it, so he tried to redeem himself by finally shaking Max's hand and saying, "I mean, I've heard your name before." If Gabe held on for a moment longer than strictly necessary, then, well, who had to know?

"Yeah, I've seen you around at the meets and practices. You're a good boyfriend to support Jo like that."

Gabe didn't even try to hold back his snort this time. "Seriously, why does everyone always think we're dating? Do we honestly give off that vibe?"

"You mean, you're not?" Max laughed a little. "I guess I just assumed. I always see you two together at school. I mean, you actually sit through entire track meets. That's some loyalty for a friend."

Gabe made a conscious effort not to speak out loud when he thought, _I'm not usually there for _her_, _because that was not something Max Habernash, with his hair and eyes and _everything_, needed to know. "They're not that bad."

Max laughed again, and Gabe could swear that his knees went weak at the sound. "Please, I'm actually _on_ the track team, and I think they're that bad." Gabe held himself back from pointing out that Max wasn't just "on" the track team. Max was the star of the track team. Hell, Max _was_ the track team.

"Alright, so there are times-" like when Chad Umphworth was running "-that it'd be more enjoyable to bang my head against a sharp rock," Gabe conceded.

Max smiled wider, so that Gabe could really see all his shining teeth. Honestly, Max Habernash probably _shit_ sunshine. "At the least the rock would actually get you somewhere. For a track meet, those things move _slowly_."

Gabe laughed and tried not to make it sound desperate or demented. He was having a conversation with _Max Habernash_ and it was actually going well. They were laughing and getting along and _talking_- so of course Jo chose that moment to reappear with a bag in each hand.

"Good, Gabe, take these," she said, not even pausing before shoving the bags onto Gabe's arms. Then she noticed Max's presence and turned on him with an predatory smile. "Ah, Max, good to see you. I see you've met Gabe."

Max looked mildly uncomfortable. "Yeah, he was just explaining to me how he's not your boyfriend." Max cast an accusing look at the bags Gabe was toting, and Gabe was aware that he wasn't really helping his case.

"Oh, believe me, this ship will never sail. It was never even packed, and now it's been permanently decommissioned. I can say for certain that Gabe here is incredibly single."

Gabe wasn't sure if he wanted to hug or punch Jo. He got that feeling a lot.

Max squinted his eyes in confusion and tilted his head away from Jo, like she was intending on leaping forward and eating it. Which, to be fair, wasn't that far of a stretch. "Right. Well, I should probably be off. Christmas shopping, you know?"

He said it to Gabe, not Jo, and smiled again before walking away. Gabe didn't take his eyes off Max (and Max's fine ass) until he turned the corner. He was still a little dazed, so Jo, being the kind and loving friend she was, elbowed him in the side. Hard


End file.
